How It All Began

I was chilling at a party at my pal John’s house in good ole “Farmfield”, smokin’ out and witnessing drug deals that would have sent at least 2 handfuls of people straight to the electric chair. As time passed by and the bong kept going ’round and ’round, darkness fell upon the sleepy little town I had come to call home, and herds of people began flowing into the doorway, all with a unique look about them, much like myself I suppose.

I was doing the usual meet and greet, saying hi, introducing myself…

I was far more extroverted back then. See… I had just lost the love of my life. My girl and I had been broken up for a few months, it was the longest relationship I’d ever had at that point of my life, 2 1/2 years… I began blaming myself for the whole tragic end to our love after the first month… as a result, I was obviously “damaged goods” to the rest of the female universe because I never got much attention during that rough patch of my life.


Everyone kept the fire going and smoke poured into my lungs and made me that much more numb to my own pain and self torment. Suddenly, I began hearing the tale of “bubble wrap guy” from a few various sets of people that had trickled in.

Apparently the day before, there was a guy who had come over and found himself some bubble wrap from some place, and took it upon himself to strip down naked and wrap a sheet of bubble wrap across his waist, and just proceed to “hang out” on the couch. I didn’t really think anything of it, the voices in my head were chattering about how much of a piece of shit I was and how I need to find a way to get back on my feet again.

When I heard people telling the story, I related to the type of conversation you overhear while your waiting in line for the restroom at a club or maybe eating out at a “not-so-classy” restaurant.

The house began to fill up, now people were sitting in on the floor, completing the circle for the bong pass, with the exception of the few “orbiting” smokers that tend to get skipped because they don’t remain stationary for the stoner bong pass.

This is where the man himself…

the legend…

Mr. Bubble Wrap Guy, walks through the door.

Most of the people there already knew of his amazing talent and started cheering him on, as for the rest of us… we were all kind of in a state of denial that some just handed him a sheet of bubble wrap while standing next to the bathroom door…

The guy disappears into the bathroom with the sheet, and everyone busts out laughing. I started to get a little uneasy… I’m not homophobic, or even uncomfortable talking about sex and the like, but that bubble wrap had but a very faint tint of pink to it… and well… I made up my mind that if that guy comes out in nothing but the wrap, and I see “bits-and-pieces”, I’m fuckin’ leaving.

Sure enough…

Dude walks out and I get a full frontal body glance of this cat with nothing on but bubble wrap… as he walks over to the couch 5 feet from me, I rise to my feet and say “Ok… John, I gotta go bro…” as I turned and grabbed the doorknob, I hear one of the guys that bubble wrap guy sat next to ask, “Hey man, you think I could get a ride back to my house?” “Come on dude, let’s get the fuck outta here.” I replied. We walked out to the Geo Metro (50 miles to the gallon baby, Woot Woot! I had so much fun in that car…) he and I start conversing.

His name is Ryan, and he had a little bit of herb and I had the piece to burn it in…


we smoked out the Geo.

We discussed the events that took place and such, and then started talking about what we do for a living. I had just started college at the time and didn’t have a job at that moment.

That’s when it all began.

He said, “I’m the Manager over at Pizza Shop on Nilles, I could get you a job as a driver bro… If your license is legit and you have insurance and all that, I can hire you tomorrow.”

The rest is history… in the making.


I love that story, because no matter how fucked up life gets sometimes, good things can happen as a result. You’ve GOT to look at the big picture, sometimes you go through pain and anguish, but after you weather the storm, the sun will shine.

Hakuna Matata.


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