Shoelace Drift

Yep! It's Shoelace Drift I would be set for life if I could just get my infomercial on television.

You know how your shoelaces become uneven after awhile and one side gets longer than the other and you can’t tie a decent bow? There’s an actual term for it! That’s shoelace drift. It’ll happen when you least expect it like when you’re running late.  You’ll do some quick knot to hold long enough to get you where you need to go. You’ll fix it later, right? No! You get home at the end of the day, kick off your shoes without untying them and forget about it until tomorrow, when you’re running late again so you end up doing it over again. Eventually, after doing this a few times, you unlace the whole shoe and get it straightened out, maybe.

Shoelace drift sure sounds a lot like my life. My “to-do” pile is twice as big as my “done” pile. Oh, I’ve got shoelace drift! I work more than I sleep. It’s that darned shoelace drift! I’ve only paid two out of ten bills.

Yep! Shoelace drift!

If I could come up with a remedy I’d be set for life. I’ve got the perfect infomercial.

“Have more work than time? More bills than cash? More exes than lovers? One tit bigger than the other? You’ve got Shoelace drift and I’ve got the cure for you! For just $19.99 plus shipping and handling you’ll get……”

Well, I don’t know what you’ll get but if you call in the next 30 minutes, you’ll get not one, not two, but three for just $19.99!

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